Flying on Fumes

I've been flying on fumes for the past few weeks. I have ADD. Some "lucky" people have ADHD, they've got hyperactivity thrown in and can't slow down...to me, that means they get an awful lot done before collapsing. I'm on the opposite end of that spectrum which means, I wake up pooped. Can sleep all night if there's no kitten nursing my nose at 4:30am (this has been happening a little more than I'd like, lately) and still wake up completely exhausted. I've actually spent my life like this until recently being diagnosed and going on meds to get my brain chemistry "normal" whatever the heck normal is. The first week of the new meds and I was just freaked with happiness...for the first time since puberty (no kidding!) I didn't feel a need to sleep before bedtime....I didn't need a nap after breakfast, working out (yes, I used to work out once upon a time, dangit..gonna do that again one day), didn't need a nap after my nap...I'm sure you get the picture. After a couple of months it was suggested I try a new med. The doctor said there were so many awesome meds out for ADD now that scientists had learned so much more about the condition, etc that it was always smarter to try a few and then go with the one that worked the best. So, I'm finishing my first month on Stratera...*yawn*...once again, sleep has become of major importance in my daily routine. Not a good time seeing that I'm over the top busy. I'm praying for a little relief as we leave for vacation on Tuesday...would hate to experience the narcalepsy thing in the middle of horseback riding. :) Thanks for letting me vent. oxox

Comments

[tracy]

Judy, When I first was diagnosed, I called my mother and explained what I'd learned. She had always been way over the top with energy. She's an amazing woman and gets more done in a day than I get done in a week. I remember telling her last summer, on a visit with her that I'd give anything just to have one tenth of her energy...(she's 22 yrs older and can run circles around me), she looked at me and said, "Tracy, you don't want what I have. I can never turn it off...sometimes I think I'm crazy because I can never just sit down and relax...I go until I collapse." When I told her about the diagnosis I believe she was able for the first time to find a reason for her activity. Many women are never diagnosed because we're able to plug right along with schoolwork, etc and do well, despite the disorder. I read that two of the common factors among ADD people are their intelligence and their creativity. My Dr. told me that Einstein had ADD. We're in good company. oxox

[Stacie Rife]

Take it easy girlfriend! Don't be so hard on yourself either! YOU NEED a vacation, and I am so happy for you that you get one SOON! Luv ya!

[natalie]

You definately don't want to fall off that horse!! I did that last summer when we went to a dude ranch in Wyoming!!! We had a blast, but I got a little overexcited in a cow penning cempoetition, thinking I was a cowgirl, and boom! I landed on my head.....I still have a bump on the back of my head. Maybe that's what is wrong with me!! Hope you have a wonderful time on your trip!!

[Judy]

My gosh, you have described me exactly with the ADHD. The hyperactivity is just exhausting and I always catch myself bubbling all over people with less "up" than me. It makes me feel bizarre. Thank you so much for talking about this publicly. I think so many artists have this "disorder". Is that part of why we turn to making art? I dont know. I just know that treatment helps if you need it. (it runs in families) Judy