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Oct 19, 2006


Oh hon! (((hugs))) I'm so happy to hear you are on your way to getting things all sorted out. Please let us know how your appointment with Susan goes.

I too have been withdrawing lately...feeling out of sorts, stressed, and down. I'm making some progress now, but it's slow going. Finally got the support I needed on the homefront, but it's going to take some time for me to work my way through the funk I'm in. At least I have some time to do it now.

I'll be keeping you in my prayers hon! Send me a note or give me a call when you feel up to it.
It seems like a break thru... a good thing. You have a good heart, listen to it, and learn to trust it. Re: the France news.... You lucky duck! and P.S. I think you rock!!
Oh, p.s. Have a wonderful trip to France. I wish I could fit in your suitcase.
I too can relate to being very hurt by someone who I thought was a good friend. It's happened a few times in my life, the latest a few years ago and it had to do with my quilt work. It all stemmed from jealousy & trying to one up me. It took a while to get over it. I am cautious about trusting new friends but am not going to let it stop me from doing what I want to do with my life. I am glad you will talk to your doctor about this. I'm sure they will be able to help you & get you back on track. I, among tons of other people out there LOVE your work & hope the best for you.
You and I are two peas in a pod when it comes to living with our hearts wide open. (must be because we share a b-day!) I have always operated under the principle that people are basically good and kind and sometimes that is not so and I find out the hard way. I think sometimes when you are kind and generous and open, people who don't have the best of intentions see that and mistake it for weakness. They see it as an opportunity to stomp all over your heart. All I can say is there have been several times where I have had this happen and it makes me really angry because despite getting hurt, I am who I am and I can't see living my life any other way. I love people and I want to experience as much as I can-we only get to go around once! What I have changed is who I allow into what I call my "sacred circle". This is the people whom I trust deeply and who know the core of who I am. That is only open to people who have earned my deepest trust and it is a small and select group. I know you are like me-you have a soft heart, you care about people, your friends are precious. All I can tell you Tracy is that this is who you are. People DO need to earn your trust if they want to be close to you. Friendship is a priviledge and a gift-you are offering your most loving and special self to be shared and if someone doesn't see that for the precious gift it is, then perhaps they are not worthy of it. People who abuse that are squandering the gift of knowing you. *hugs girlfrind*
Tracy =^..^=

I felt this post so deeply. It stunned me. I understand this one far too well. (right down to the phone thing.)

I too trust in the good of people and it seems somewhat recently that I should not trust anymore. Still, I do. I just can't help but believe that there is good inside of everyone ... and can't bring myself to fault people for what others have done to me in the past. And like you, I get hurt because of this a lot. I don't take it well. Why would they do this? It would never even occur to me to be so mean.

I recently had an experience that dropped me to my knees with one horrible blow. A friend I had trusted forever did something to me I still can't comprehend. Not just the once, but then proceeded to torment me over something verbally in hiddious emails & letters left at my door. Finally it impacted me enough to make me closeup into a ball. Draw the curtains and unplug.

I had done nothing to her but to be kind.

I understand what you are saying about unconditional trust & finding it hard to continue onward in the same way ... As you have in the back of your head a little something watching for the something bad you have come to expect to happen.

One thing I do know is who my real friends are now. And slowly I am trying to come out of hidding. Trying to trust in myself again ... To trust enough in human kind that I will not let this keep me away from my life any longer.

And that is the hardest part. Trusting me.

=^..^= love zU
(That vintage fabric for your mini puppies project is still here anytime you want it. Yep Yep Yep!)
wow. I have been there. yes, it's so hard when you trust someone with all your heart and then get crushed. I think that fear is always what holds us back...fear of being hurt, fear of success, fear of change, etc. etc. I think that when you are an artist your creativity is tied into your emotions (at least it is with me) so sometimes issues keep us away from the one place that is full of trust and safety, our little art world. oh, I hope you work through this, I know you will. I think we all have times we want to pull away and access/understand what's going on. I had to chuckle about the phone thing...I hate phones! i hardly check my messages, I think it's just extra noise, I prefer going out for coffee with a friend rather than catching up over the phone. anyhoo, have a great, great trip. you are a very talented artists and good person and don't let others untrusting behaviour change your trusting heart. there are still many people who can be trusted and have the best intentions in mind. they are the people that get us through times where we aren't sure about who to trust. take care of yourself! lia
you know what, i think you are great, i wear my emotions on my sleeve along with my heart and what you see is what you get with me..trust your heart, i always have and it has worked out..you are a good egg!! xox~k

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